Affing Funny, Watch Yer Bean, Do It

1. Giraffe. Carafe. Laugh.
2. Beans and seeds. Which are which?
3. What if enthusiastic people actually did things? 

See Brockeim.com There is little there to see, but, still, you should.  I need the traffic, the advertising looks and product sales. Come, Christmas is coming.

I Am (not) the Greatest, Full of Hot Air, Giving You the Bird

1. I had a shot at greatness. I took aim, and pulled the trigger. Perfect bulls-eye. RIP, Greatness.
2. Few things are sadder than a dying balloon.
3. "'Scuze me while I kiss the sky... and kill some green pigs when I land." - Jimi Hendrix, noted Angry Birds aficionado.

Search Amazon.com for Angry Birds 

Jimi Hendrix Video, Purple Haze (mp3)

5:00, Hos, Lick It

1. The best time is the five minutes before sleeping, when dreaming while still awake.
2. HoHos were best when wrapped in aluminum foil.
3. Taste life.  

Hostess Ho-Hos 2 boxes 20 cakes 

Tying the Knot, Basketing Eggs, Righteous Clout

1. Sometimes a knot is just a tangled rope.
2. Collect your thoughts all in one basket.
3. It isn't what you know, but who you know. Love your neighbor.  

Search Amazon.com for rope 

ToolTalk, Liberian, What's Bad is Good for You

1. Have you ever really talked with your writing tools? Pencils? Pens. Word processing software?
2. Give me liberty. I don't want the death part.
3. Every once in a while, we all drink bad coffee. Be thankful anyway. To be able to tell the difference means you are wealthy enough to afford either.

Writing Tools: 50 Essential Strategies for Every Writer 

Play (Play), Scent of Now, Even Enemies

1. Play.
2. Smelling the roses is easy. Smell the ordinary scents of life too.
3. Always regard people as important. No one should be excluded.

Play: How it Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul 

ZYXing, Duh?, Sing Outloud

1. So much of life is alphabetical. Know your ABCs.
2. Plan as if your opponent is brilliant.
3. Sing until you are hoarse. Life is too short to save your voice.  

ABC (The Alphabet Song) 

Dracula, Panic Attacking, Confusion

1. Dracula... curricula. Not sure what to make of this rhyme.
2. Is it better to freak out or panic?
3. I asked, "You must be kidding." He said, "Yes, I am."  

 Dracula (free for Kindle)

Being Energetic, Are You a Repeater?, Freedom's Myth

1. A lot of energy is used up chasing, and not enough being.
2. If someone read all your Tweets, would they think you are interesting or think you think everyone else is interesting.
3. The best things aren't free. French fries, for example, are $1.50. 

French Fries 

Philology, Make Love (Which Means Coffee), Yes We Can?

1. Sometimes, Dr. Phil is right.
2. Makes coffee, not war.
3. If a phrase reads, "Yes, we can," what are you doing? 

Yes We Can Can 

Zombies, Vampires, Fairies

1. Are zombies ever nice?
2. What if a vegan becomes a vampire?
3. If a person has dentures, loses them, does the Tooth Fairy lay down some cash?

Search Amazon.com for zombies 

Cancel?, No Soup Stain For You!, Shut Up Already

1. What if Monday was cancelled? Would the world be happier?
2. Ties can hide soup stains on shirts.
3. Fight for things which matter. Get off the bandwagon and into the trenches.

 Larry Thomas - The Soup Nazi - Autographed 8x10 Photograph with No Soup For You Inscription

Egg Flower Child, Chicken Power, Conspiracy Quacks

1. Don't put all your eggplants in one flower basket.
2. If the chicken had never crossed the road, what questions would we be asking?
3. Those who are paranoid of Osama bin Laden conspiracy theorists... what's that?

Ferry-Morse 3053 Organic Eggplant Seeds, Early Long Purple (500 Milligram Packet)

Lesson from Osama bin Laden's Courier, Kindle Bible, Green M&M

1. Lesson from Osama bin Laden's courier: Never ask on your cell phone, "Can you hear me now?"
2. Kindle vs paper books thought: Do you suppose Johannes Gutenberg's friends secretly thought, "They will never read the Bible like that. Not fancy enough"?
3. Do a handful of yellow and blue M&Ms achieve the same result as green M&Ms? 

Free on Kindle: The Holy Bible English Standard Version (ESV)
Same book, not on Kindle:  The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Red Letter Edition)
Not on Kindle: M&M - Milk Chocolate, 56 oz bag

Dirt Gift, Easy Does It, Osama bin Laden is Dead

1. Coffee comes from dirt. And God.
2. It is really a lot easier than we pretend.
3. Out of nonsense for the day: Osama bin Laden is dead.  

Pretend Soup and Other Real Recipes: A Cookbook for Preschoolers and Up

'Bama Tornado, Wheeling No Deal, Later Dude

1. Alabama's tornado: Not nonsense. Give to your local charity. 
2. I reinvented the wheel. Mine is square. Back to the drawing board. 
3. No matter how late it is, tomorrow is still not yet.

Search Amazon.com for tornado