December 31, 2009

Ending It All, Romance, 43

  1. Everything ends. Get things right in 2010. No, I don't mean call Dr. Kevorkian's Death on Demand.
  2. Romance - completely organic mood-altering drug. Get doped up in 2010.
  3. Upon further calculation, try 43. Somehow we lost one in the move. Nothing to do with 2010 here.

December 30, 2009

SuperConnection, Wallaby Power, Not Worth It

  1. Are Jimmy Olsen and Ross Geller the same person?
  2. Never underestimate a wallaby.
  3. High maintenance. Not all artists, all models, all wealthy gals. Most recently built Jaguars.

December 29, 2009

Puppy Happiness, 20,000, Clouded Coffee

  1. Is happiness really a warm puppy? Did Charles Schulz research this assertion?
  2. Anything over 20,000 should be a good score. Someone needs to look into this.
  3. What if the song was really about him, and the problem was really hers? Vanity is sometimes enlivened by coffee, with, or without, clouds.

December 28, 2009

Dreamt Realities, Bowing and Presenting, Lemons That Are Lemons

  1. Some dreams are memories as sweet as their simple reality. Long drives, shared coffee, conversations outside cafes...Enjoy the little things in 2010.
  2. Not all presents have bows.
  3. When the world gives you lemons... sometimes more than the car is sour.

December 24, 2009

Wounding Time, Missle-Toe, Bicameral

  1. Time does not heal all wounds. Whoever said that never had a broken heart.
  2. Mistletoe: turns out it is semi-parasitic. Figures. It grows all-year round, vigorously in Brockeimia.
  3. Bicameral is not the controversy involving gender vagaries among photographers.

December 23, 2009

Pre-pre Christmas Silence, Momma Does Know, What's Up Chuck?

  1. Twas the night before the night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring... because they were all at the mall.
  2. Momma never said there would be days like this? Sure she did. Weren't you listening?
  3. Whatever Chuck says is fine be me.

December 22, 2009

Tipping Coffee, Chess Cafe?, Toweling Off a Chill

  1. Coffee tip - change up your bean selection every few weeks to keep favorite roast tasting as you like.
  2. When a chess player knows he has been beat, that it is just a matter of moves, he tips his king as to say, "You are the better player, I can see this. We will play again." There is no such comparison with coffee.
  3. Solution for a chilly day? Towels pulled straight from the drier.

December 15, 2009

Twaining Families Never Meeting, Vigorous Vimming, Ides of December

  1. "Never the twain shall meet" is not a reference to a curse affirming why Mark Twain never partook in a family reunion.
  2. You've got your vigor without your vim, but where's your vim without your vigor?
  3. These ides of December are no great thrill either. March, at least, is warmer.

December 14, 2009

Mornings About, Helen's Hand Basket, Blessed Mondays

  1. What about mornings?
  2. Why Helen was in a hand basket, I'll never know.
  3. Fridays are blessed, but so are Mondays.

December 08, 2009

Hounds of Brockeimia, Snow God, Peace Has no Chance

  1. Just once, I'd like to say, "Release the hounds," with due cause.
  2. Snow is God reminding who is in charge.
  3. Peace won't get a chance so long as people believe their rights are more important than yours.

December 04, 2009

Taste and See, Contenderizing, Monday's Selfish (Pass the Coffee)

  1. Tasting is part of seeing.
  2. No, you could not have been a contender.
  3. Coffee isn't just for Monday morning.

December 03, 2009

Nursery rhyme truth 18: (Rumplestilskin's Resume), Top Seven,

  1. Nursery rhyme truth 18: What was Rumplestilskin's usual job? Did he have references?
  2. Thursday is in the top seven days of the week.
  3. Consider the boll weevil's finer points.

December 02, 2009

Coffee Solvent, Golden Sands, Headaches

  1. Coffee solves everything.
  2. When people in the arid parts of the world envy their neighbor's home, do they say the sand looks golder on the other side of the fence?
  3. Headaches are overrated.

November 30, 2009

Tasting Monday, Christmas Lament, Chicken Writers

  1. Monday is delicious. Taste it.
  2. Rather than lamenting about Christmas commercialism, try quietly living generously by giving your gift budget to a homeless shelter.
  3. "Pullets her," has nothing to do with award-winning journalism covering chicken farming.

November 27, 2009

Day After, Grouse Watching, Leftovers: Thanksgiving

  1. The day after a holiday is the beginning of forgetting what we celebrate. Be thankful always.
  2. "Look at the grouse. Look at the grouse," was how the Three Stooges' Curly would point out the people who refused to realize how good they had it. Be thankful, not a grouse.
  3. Leftovers are great memories worth tasting twice.

November 20, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #17 (Hair Tales), Raisin Bread, The Book of Lamentations

  1. Nursery Rhyme Truth #17: Hair is good. Just ask Rapunzel. Or Samson.
  2. Raisin bread... so much happiness can be found in four toasted slices with a smudge of butter.
  3. Too much lamenting, not enough living I say. Live freely.

November 19, 2009

Coffee Mug About Coffee and Books and Food (All at Once)



Books are good food.
Wash them down with coffee.
Buy now


...just an ad to entice you to buy a mug so I can afford coffee...
Great Christmas gift for that coffee bookworm sort at work

Nursery Rhyme Truth #16 (Candy Killer), Delirium Hobbiests, PBJ Authority

  1. Nursery Rhyme Truth #16: Too much candy can kill you. Just ask Hansel and Gretal, or diabetic person's widow.
  2. Delirium is overrated as a hobby.
  3. What do you think makes up the perfect PBJ?

November 18, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #15 (Hottie with Midgits), Politically Crass, Tasty

  1. Nursery Rhyme Truth #15: Beautiful young woman spends her days with seven very short, old, single and peculiar men. What do you think? Eunuchs, self-inflicted?
  2. Why is anyone ever surprised when a politician acts like a politician?
  3. Strange how it is that sometimes things which do not taste good are delicious.

November 17, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #14 (Benedict Arnold), Lucy's Irresponsibility, God's Gift

  1. Nursery Rhyme Truth #14: There's no proof Benedict Arnold made Humpty Dumpty the first Eggs Benedict. But... there's no proof he didn't.
  2. Say what you will, but Lucy was irresponsible when she brought those famous diamonds to the sky.
  3. The first cup of coffee before sunrise is no more spiritual than the last cup after sunset, but I am blessed to have it. Thank God for coffee.

November 16, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #13 (Sierra Club), Extra Credit, Kissing Espressos

  1. Nursery Rhyme Truth #12: The woodsman was not part of the Sierra Club.
  2. Consider everything extra credit.
  3. The unexpected espresso is like a stolen kiss from a beautiful woman...

November 13, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #12 (Blue Chips), Jokers and Thieves, Time Killin' Time

  1. Nursery rhyme truth #12: Watch out where Paul Bunyan's ox invests. Word on the street is he is into blue chips. Which reminds me, watch where you step when he's around.
  2. Why were the joker and the thief along the watch tower in the first place?
  3. Need to kill some time? Try a few rounds of "Around the Mulberry Bush."

November 12, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #11 (Bailout for the Elderly), Where Childhood's Sidewalk Ends, Borrowing Necessarily

  1. Nursery rhyme truth #11: Where's the real estate bailout for the little old lady who lived in a shoe?
  2. When does childhood end?
  3. I contend people should borrow more stuff. Be more dependent.

November 11, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #10 (Pie Hole Strategy), Chaotic Order, Chewed Gum

  1. Nursery rhyme truth #10: There are easier ways to eat pie besides using one's thumb, but no more satisfying.
  2. One person's disorder is another person's chaos.
  3. Just because it is gum doesn't mean it should be chewed.

November 10, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #9 (Ribbing at Home), Order in the Math, Beauty

  1. Nursery rhyme truth 9: Architecture matters. Ask the two plates of pork ribs at the wolf's house.
  2. #7 and #8... who made the rule that they must come in that order? (a typo caused my earlier error, for those following such things)
  3. More is beautiful than we acknowledge.

November 09, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #8 (Background Checks), Foolishly Objective, Lazy Bellowing

  1. Nursery rhyme truth 8: Little is known about the woodsman. Someone should look into his background.
  2. We have faith in things we speculate and theorize, and call those who speculate and theorize about other things fools, pretending objectivity.
  3. Roses are yellow,
    so are daisies,
    I thought I'd bellow,
    feeling quite lazy.

November 06, 2009

Nurset Rhyme Truth #7 (Sordid Red), John's Cake, Indulging Friends

  1. Nursery rhyme truth 7: Little Red Riding has a sordid past, and her history carrying cookies is dubious, at best. Let's just say she's not so little anymore and we are out of cookies.
  2. Johnny cakes? Is this some red light district euphemism?
  3. Dessert with the right person may be simple, yet an indulgence. Indulge often.

November 05, 2009

Coffee Mug About Coffee and Books and Food (All at Once)



Books are good food.
Wash them down with coffee.
Buy now


...just an ad to entice you to buy a mug so I can afford coffee...
Great Christmas gift for that coffee bookworm sort at work

Nursery Rhyme Truth #6 (Woody), Breathing Dentists, Rhyming Garbage

  1. Nursery rhyme truth 6: When entering a woody area, if the trees start talking, be afraid. It will probably be a bad day.
  2. One of four dentists breath while doing a tooth extraction... just as do the other three of four. The same cannot necessarily be said of the patient.
  3. Not everything that rhymes is poem.

November 04, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #5 (Glossolalia), Ughing, Voting into Freedom

  1. Nursery rhyme truth 5: Fee fi fo fum is not 'speaking in tongues'. Glossolalia? More like giant la la la.
  2. Though' ends in 'ugh', which is sometimes apropos.
  3. Voting is just the start of freedom.

November 03, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #4 (Wolfy), Tuesday's Blues, 2-6ing the List

  1. Nursery rhyme truth 4: A wolf is never the good guy.
  2. Tuesday never gets the credit it deserves.
  3. Seeing The Bucket List is not on my bucket list.

November 02, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #3 (Mirrors), Facts and Truths, Walling Ceilings

  1. Nursery rhyme truth 3: Mirrors which talk should not be trusted.
  2. What counts as fact is one thing, but what counts as truth is another. One is negotiable.
  3. Who is more important? The guy who invented walls, or the guy who invented ceilings?

October 30, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #2, Greetings, Earthling, Brownie Equality

  1. Nursery rhyme truth 2: Avoid anyone offering free apples, seeds or berries.
  2. Who first suggested a visitor from another planet would say, "Greetings, Earthling"?
  3. Not all brownies are created equally.

October 29, 2009

Nursery Rhyme Truth #1, Sooner or Earlier, San Jose Mapping

  1. Nursery rhyme truth 1: Steer clear of homes owned by bears.
  2. No one ever says "sooner or earlier."
  3. Why does anyone need to know the way to San Jose? Try using Google maps.

October 28, 2009

Lungos Filled With Hot Air, Forgetting the Alamo, Mining for Gold Teeth

  1. Lungos have nothing to do with lungs, but, if sipped just right on a tired day, they can help breathe in new life.
  2. What did people remember before the Alamo was built?
  3. Using a toothpick to locate gold indicates the lack of a wisdom tooth.


Gold Metallic Grillz Teeth Adult
Buy Gold Metallic Grillz Teeth Adult at Amazon.com
(More Gold Teeth stuff)

    October 27, 2009

    Instant Crema, Tourniquietology, Stressed Lions

    1. Instant crema is gonna get you. - what John Lennon would have sang if he were a barista at a posh metaphysical coffee bar.
    2. Tourniquet. Turn a kit. There it is, but what can you do with it?
    3. Stress? Stress is a lion chasing after a guy in a flat field with no trees. The lion is worried he is eating too much fatty food.

    Lennon Legend: The Very Best of John Lennon

    October 26, 2009

    Golden Silence, Raindrops in a Dry Room, Sherbet

    1. Silence, I hear, is golden.
    2. Can I sing "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head" by BJ Thomas indoors, without lying?
    3. Rainbow sherbet. Once mixed, what flavor is it?

    October 23, 2009

    Friday the 23rd, TGIM, The Shame of Ireland


    1. Friday the 23rd. Doesn't have the same ring to it. November gets a Friday the 13th, by the way.
    2. 10% of employable citizens in the United States didn't go to work this week. Thank God for Friday, but thank Him for Monday through Thursday too.
    3. Whiskey good. Coffee good. But the two together? Not so good. Irish coffee is something the Irish should regret more than they do.

    Be sure to follow my new blog dedicated to coffee love.

    October 22, 2009

    Thursday Celebrating, Gun Jumpin', Polka Pity Party

    1. On Christmas, people celebrate the birth of Christ. On Thursday, others celebrate being thirsty. Fridays? Lots of hot oil and chicken wings.
    2. Nothing says, "jump the gun" like partisan politics.
    3. Polka. It's not what you think... OK, yes it is.

    October 21, 2009

    When Cranberries Attack. The Other Side, Olive Tea

    1. Cranberries approach their greatest culinary triumph in just over a month.
    2. Political extremists are embarrassed when their enemy is similar to their hero.
    3. Olives do not belong in coffee. Or tea.

    October 20, 2009

    Paranoia, Day Cooping, Sunlight

    1. If you are paranoid and nothing happens, are you happy... or worried?
    2. Cooperate with the day.
    3. By the time most of you have read this, the sun has risen.

    October 19, 2009

    Lilacs, Outrage, Elvis Sighting

    1. Lilacs and italics almost rhyme. Both lean in the wind.
    2. Which is easier? Outrage at a distant injustice or volunteer to reduce a local concern?
    3. People named Elvis are always asked a question.

    October 16, 2009

    Clouding the Issue, Why Wabbits?, What About Bob?

    1. On the other side of the clouds, I think it must be very sunny.
    2. I have never seen a wabbit, and am uncertain why anyone would hunt for them.
    3. Discombobulated. Often doing, less often said.

    October 15, 2009

    Haircutting, Oceans 1, Brain Rockets

    1. When were haircuts invented?
    2. If I don't live near the ocean, how will I know when my ship comes in?
    3. Brain surgery... what? It isn't rocket science.

    October 14, 2009

    Kaldi the Coffee Hero, 52 Books, Dry Rain

    1. Kaldi is the original Juan Valdez. Where's his holiday?
    2. There are 52 books on the second shelf from the top, on the right, in the bookshelf on my left. With ten shelves, this could mean 520 books, not counting my other shelves.
    3. Wherever it is raining, the sky is drying up.

    October 13, 2009

    Cracked Cheeks, Spider Webs in the Wind, Muse Death

    1. If I smile in cold weather, will my face crack?
    2. What is it about spider webs, that one single three-inch strand of an old web, blowing on the ceiling, is so fascinating?
    3. Muses never die. They just go into a witness protection program.

    October 12, 2009

    Monday Fun, Palindromic Nonsense, Dogs Online

    1. Go ahead, make fun of Monday. There will be another one, just as bold, next week.
    2. In a sense, nonsense is innocence. (Not a palindrome, I know, but it must be something. Any ideas?)
    3. On the internet, no one knows you are a dog? That's not entirely true.

    October 09, 2009

    Bitter Sweeties, Tubby Brains, Sleep's Usefulness

    1. When you add it all up, 'bitter sweet' is still a bad thing. There is always more bitter than sweet.
    2. Books are good food. They'll make your brain fat. Just make sure your head doesn't swell.
    3. The best thing about sleep? Coffee on the other side...



    Books are good food.
    Wash them down with coffee.
    Buy now

    October 08, 2009

    Silly Things, Cup Thought, Wake Up and Smell the Dream

    1. Silly things are said by those who don't think about what they are saying. Even sillier are those who do...
    2. Think outside the cup.
    3. Dream more while awake.

    October 07, 2009

    Thirst Eternal, Coffee Day?, Billy Idol

    1. It is better to drink than to be thirsty.
    2. If yesterday was buy someone a cup of coffee day, what is today?
    3. In the midnight hour, she cried, "More, more, more." Billy Idol probably sang this song about his parrot. The parrot heard Billy as a young man ask his assistant for coffee. Is that enough? No, more, more, more.

    October 06, 2009

    Complaining, Bookish Intentions, Holy Ground Squirrel

    1. The more I complain about the bad, the less I exalt the good.
    2. Is the internet slow? Time to finish reading another book.
    3. Chipmunks are not religious.

    October 05, 2009

    Dwarfing Characters, Octaves Below Reality, Troubles Once Not Known

    1. Sneezy, Sleepy, Doc... you know the list. Name the forgotten dwarves. 
    2. Morning voice.What do opera singers sound like first thing when they wake up? 
    3. I often hear from friends that no one knows the troubles they've seen, but then, they proceed to tell us. Now, we know.

    October 02, 2009

    Stolen Breaths, Fridays Are More Than Fridays, Sing (2)

    1. A beautiful girl walked by, took my breath away. I want it back.
    2. Fridays may be the end of weeks, but they can also be the beginnings of months.
    3. Have you sung yet? What's keeping you?

    October 01, 2009

    Paradigm Shifting, Seventh Day Coffee Breakist, Sing

    1. I worked the paradigm shift after the graveyard shift, but I left early during a coffee break. My boss never paid me.
    2. On the seventh day of Creation, God took a coffee break.
    3. Sing. What are you waiting for?

    September 30, 2009

    Yawning Economy, Idle Rich, Book Love

    1. Three things can follow a good yawn.. a nap, coffee, or a long day. I pity that 33% who make the wrong choice.
    2. Idle. Say it ten times fast. Quite the good time there waiting to happen. Give it a try, don't miss out.
    3. When the work of the day is through, find a friendly book.

    September 29, 2009

    Banjos Dueling to the Death, Licorice, Old Friends/Fresh Brews

    1. If banjos dueled, would blood be spilled?
    2. Licorice... no ambivalence there.
    3. Afternoon coffee is like meeting an old friend. I feel better, energized, with a good taste in my mouth.

    September 28, 2009

    Zip Code at the World's End, Ellipsis Love, Monday Love

    1. When the world ends, what is your preferred zip code?
    2. Love your ellipsis...
    3. I love Mondays. Seven days in a week, and I am thankful for each. Whether filled with coffee, or working out the day solo, all is good.

    September 25, 2009

    New Words:Old Songs, Forking Good, Nessie's in My Coffee

    1. Ever just want to sing new words to old songs?
    2. Forks in the road can be rough, but a fork in some chocolate cake? That's a good thing.
    3. Decaf. Loch Ness Monster. Santa Claus. You get the idea.

    September 24, 2009

    Charming Art, Bagel Love, Play It Again, Sam

    1. Charm is an unpracticed art. Give it a try.
    2. Bagels. They aren't perfect, but they give it a go.
    3. One more time. Too often a phrase used at the wrong time and not enough at the right time. Timing is everything.

    September 23, 2009

    Yesterday's Muse, Nuttin', Equality Not

    1. Too much is said about yesterday.
    2. There's more to nothing that it might seem.
    3. Unequivocally inequivalent.
    more of Brockeim's nonsense (since January 2008)

    September 22, 2009

    Autumn Sniffing, Mourning the Evil Dead, Human Rights

    1. Autumn smells like childhood.
    2. Someone, somewhere mourns even the most evil among the dead.
    3. Complaining is what people who forget the good in their lives do. Few truly have the right to moan. I'm not hungry, living in fear, unsafe. No complaints.

    September 21, 2009

    Flu Bugs, One Trick Ponies, Momentary Exploration

    1. Influenza... influential. Phew.
    2. One trick ponies still have that one trick.
    3. Each new moment is unfamiliar territory. Enjoy the excitement of life.

    September 18, 2009

    Bikini on Bikes, Static Impossibility, Wee Mistake

    1. The difference between bikin' and bikini? Very little, on a good day.
    2. Caffeine has its place, but once consumed, staying in that one place is difficult.
    3. Look before you leap... a sign regrettably ignored in a dark restroom in a home with one man and one woman.

    September 17, 2009

    Ice Cream Antisocial, Bridge Watering, Ageless

    1. I do not believe in ice cream socials. I prefer ice cream antisocials. More ice cream for me.
    2. Water under the bridge
      makes for good fishing.
    3. Age is for other people.
      I'm other people.

    September 16, 2009

    No Direction Home, Addiction, Abandon Espresso

    1. Direction without an agenda is a dream without a plan.
    2. At my best, I am just a quippist (or do you prefer 'quipster'?) who also loves coffee. At my worst... I ran out of coffee.
    3. An espresso cup is deepest when it overflows. Pour with abandon.

    September 15, 2009

    Deer Me, Naps as Medicine, Are Your Toasted?

    1. When observing someone fawning, I can only respond, "Oh deer."
    2. Naps. Solves what coffee can't. (Who needs a health care plan when we have coffee and naps?)
    3. Life is toast? Slather it with butter. Toss some cinnamon on for good measure. A little spice can be a good thing.

    September 14, 2009

    Yammerin', Toothlessness, Internet Fidos

    1. "I yam what I yam." Popeye was more yams than spinach, yet the Yam Council of America has done so little with this.
    2. The trouble with being toothless is that sometimes, we don't recognize we are.
    3. On the internet, no one knows if you are a dog...
      but, sometimes, the dog goes out of his way to letcha know.

    September 11, 2009

    Algae, Verbing Coffee, Gravity's Hot Air

    1. Algae... the other organic food.
    2. What if coffee was a verb? What would we drink?
    3. Gravity asked a balloon what it was like to float.
      All he got was a long-winded reply.
    Remembering the children, women and men murdered by Osama bin Laden's radical Muslim group, al Qaeda.
    http://www.9-11commission.gov

    September 10, 2009

    Kopi Luwak, Ad Homina Homina Homina, Potatoes

    1. Kopi Luwak. Funny name for coffee. Even funnier when you learn how it is made. Funnier still when you realize how much they want to charge for it. And somewhere, a civet is getting a great laugh.
    2. Ad homina homina homina
      -Ralph Kramden, had his character been unexpectedly attacked
    3. Mashed potatoes. Underground bread.

    September 09, 2009

    9-9-9 (Of Course), Blind Sermons, Krugerrands

    1. 9-9-9. You knew this was coming. It could be worse. It could be June 6, 2006. Visions of John Lennon singing "Revolution #9" are coming on.
    2. Those who reject sermons blindly are akin to those who follow them blindly.
    3. A Krugerrand is not a description of Freddie Kruger's activities, nor implies anything involving a cougar (feline or female).


    Beatles' Revolution #9

    September 08, 2009

    Reality, New Year's Resolutions, Politics

    1. Does reality ever question itself?
    2. New Year's Resolutions... if you start them today (or restart them), that's better than having quit entirely. You can still lose one pound, smoke one less cigarette, and call your father just to say hi.
    3. Politics are for people who want to talk about change. Change itself requires hard work, often the kind no one sees.

    September 07, 2009

    Moony Eye, Toothless Chatter, Unemployed Lunches

    1. If the moon hit my eye (whether as a pie, cake, or even just a small tart), would I still be alive?
    2. The mere facts of having teeth does not mean you can chew.
    3. Labor Day... three cheers for the working man. Four cheers for the man who wishes he was working. If able, buy an unemployed friend lunch this week.

    September 04, 2009

    Dignity, Chocolate's Place, Ugly Lives

    1. Dignity is overrated.
    2. Chocolate has its place next to coffee.
    3. Better to live ugly than die looking good.
    Have you seen my new review? Wyler's Grape "A Cure for the Summertime Blues and Questions of Color". Nancy and I work on the big issues in life.

    See the entire blog.

    August 28, 2009

    Dry Humor, Giving in August, Fridays

    1. If you are dry, drink.
    2. What gives? Not me, not often enough. Send a few bucks to the local food pantry. Not sure where one is? Call almost any church.
    3. Fridays aren't a big deal to those who love their jobs.

    August 27, 2009

    Question Everything, Listening, Forgetting

    1. Question everything, and do not be afraid to admit you know the answer.
    2. If you listen hard enough... you might not hear anything.
    3. One thing that is often forgotten...

    August 26, 2009

    Cynical Toothaches, Meteor Days, Pilate's Truth

    1. Toothaches are like cynics. A good shot of whiskey is needed to ease the pain, but to eradicate the source, extraction is needed.
    2. Days pass like meteors which have slowed enough to see, but not enough to catch.
    3. "What's truth," asked Pilate. And look how that turned out.

    August 24, 2009

    I Love You, Sweeter Winter, Salvation of the World

    1. I love you, Caffeine. You are there for me when I'm down, and because of you, I never am.
    2. Winter is sweeter because autumn eases us in.
    3. There are those who talk about saving the world, and there are those saving the world.

    August 20, 2009

    Defining Ourselves, Beautiful Livers, Stir Your Heart

    1. When we define ourselves, we are creating a box we are unwilling to think outside of.
    2. We say beauty is only skin deep, that we want something more rich, deeper. What if we looked at a woman's liver to decide if she's beautiful?
    3. Stir your coffee.

    August 14, 2009

    Readiness, Life, Skipped Life

    1. Getting somewhere early is less important than be ready when you get there.
    2. Pouring out your life cannot compare to pouring your life into something.
    3. Life sometimes skips a day... or two.

    August 10, 2009

    Decaffing, Mondays in Hell, Bird's Eye View

    1. Decaf... to take caffeine from coffee. Recaf... my second cup.
    2. In Hell, there are no Tuesdays. Lots of Mondays, but no Tuesdays.
    3. A bird's eye view is not coveted on Thanksgiving if you are a turkey.

    August 07, 2009

    Beep-Beep, Oh Boy, Lazy People

    1. The Road Runner was not a steak eater. Probably not a lot of chicken either.
    2. I read the news today. Oh boy. I should have read a paperback.
    3. Coffee... giving lazy people energy everywhere. (buy this on a mug or t-shirt... great coffeehouse item)

    August 06, 2009

    Nonsense Prevails, Empty Mind, Named Brock?

    1. There is more nonsense in this world than we admit. Embrace the insanity. Read this blog more often.
    2. I emptied my mind. Can't you tell?
    3. Are you named Brock? Join the revolution.

    August 05, 2009

    Afternoon Delight, Charlie Chaplin, Tomorrow

    1. Few things are as tasty as a mid-day espresso.
    2. Charlie Chaplin. That's all. Charlie Chaplin. Lots said in those two words.
    3. What's yesterday got that tomorrow's missing?

    August 04, 2009

    Cheerio, Chips, Blazing Heat

    1. Which milk properly accompanies Cheerios?
    2. Potato chips are the source of much joy.
    3. Hot as blazes? No, probably not.

    August 03, 2009

    Pessimism, Hemp, Nonsense

    1. Pessimism is like, ah, who cares. No one reads these anyway.
    2. I got off my high horse. How it go in the hemp field I'll never know.
    3. Nonsense is the sort of thing that tends to matter than it should. Expect here. Here it matters... a lot.
    Have you read my reviews? They are nothing like my nonsense.
    http://brockeim.blogspot.com

    July 31, 2009

    Pee, Tea, Latte

    1. Two cats peeing on the carpet: They were told to tink outside of the box.
    2. Do practitioners of tai chi enjoy chai tea?
    3. Late is just one tiny, common letter away from latte. Anyone have a 't'?

    July 30, 2009

    Department Store Philosophy, Getting Shot, Tea Time

    1. Life is a department store. Lots to see, often overpriced, people chasing after inferior items, and too much gets returned after Christmas.
    2. Shot Advantage: Can be consumed quickly, and leaves room for breakfast.
    3. Coffee drinkers are unconcerned with tea times. Fore?

    July 29, 2009

    Nathan Hale's Lament, Bro(c)ke I'm, Duke of Earl

    1. My only regret is that I cannot drink coffee all day. - something Nathan Hale wished he would have said.
    2. I'm Bro(c)ke - Brockeim re-arranged (so check my ads)
    3. The world needs the Duke of Earl.

    July 28, 2009

    Fools Treading, Whites, Nashing Toward a Holiday

    1. Fools rush in where angels fear to tread, it is true. Other fools never tread at all.
    2. Look very carefully. White paper is not so white.
    3. Ogden Nash should have a holiday in his honor.

    July 27, 2009

    Dream Flavor, Pop Culture, Eco-Nonsense

    1. What flavor is coffee in your dreams?
    2. The term 'pop culture' is enculturated by those who deny being part of it.
    3. Modern children's eco-friendly machine: Bio-operated invisible, imaginary motorboat.

    July 24, 2009

    Toothlessness, Last Thing I Remember, Blue Moon

    1. Toothlessness is the bane of dentistry and politics.
    2. The last I remember was... wait, now there's something new. Here we go again...
    3. How can a blue moon be made of green cheese?

    July 23, 2009

    United We Stood, Energizer God, What A (Not So?) Beautiful World

    1. United we stand? I wish we still did. The fight is important.
    2. Coffee is God's gift to unenergetic people.
    3. If we lived everything we believed, would this world be scarier or more beautiful?

    July 22, 2009

    Sharkspeare, Brighten Days with a Dark Drink., Middle Ages

    1. Sharkspeare.. if a fish was the Bard.
    2. Coffee is dark, yet, when swallowed, it brightens our outlook on life. Go figure.
    3. The middle of the week is not necessarily the middle of the month.

    July 21, 2009

    Lifted Mugs, #Coffee, Autoocorect

    1. Mugs lifted up are quieter than when set down. Empty the mug before replacing.
    2. If I type #coffee with the pound sign, will I get real #coffee?
    3. Autoocorect would eb graet if if caugt everthing.

    July 20, 2009

    Coffee Pairing, Rest It, Betty Boop

    1. Not everything goes with coffee.
    2. Give what a rest? I'm tired. Coffee, remember?
    3. What if Betty Boop got married to Charlie Brown?

    July 17, 2009

    Faster?, Counting?, Lemonading

    1. What's fast is defined by what's slower.
    2. Who's counting? Really. Right now. Counting. Who?
    3. Lemonade was made for drinking.

    July 16, 2009

    What's in Yours?, Clarksville Training, Cha-cha-cha

    1. What's in your mug?
    2. I hear there is a last train going to Clarksville, but I can't find the depot.
    3. Cha-cha-cha. Saying it just never gets old. Cha-cha-cha.

    July 15, 2009

    Baby Ga Ga Rage, Free-Thinking?, Bass Pain

    1. Garage'? No, that's not the sociological term for babies who are seriously ticked off. That might be 'Crib Rage'.
    2. How often do we only like our free-thinking heroes when they agree with us?
    3. Fish hook stuck in a widemouth? Pain the bass.

    July 14, 2009

    Stewing, Social Media Circa 1950, Chicken Teeth

    1. Stewing? Try brewing.
    2. Coffee shops: the original social media.
    3. "Sink your teeth into it." - Something chickens never are told by their coaches.

    July 13, 2009

    Political Insignificance, Car Songs, Adam's English

    1. In 100 years, everyone who supported your candidate in 2008 will be dead. So what matters most?
    2. What song do you most often sing in the car?
    3. Adam and Eve did not speak English.

    July 10, 2009

    Barista Tipping, Nothing to Sneeze At, Big City Blues

    1. Have you thanked your barista lately? Tip generously.
    2. A good sneeze is worth a thousand... well, not a thousand of anything.
    3. All big cities were once small towns. Wouldn't it be nice if some still were?

    July 09, 2009

    Boxed In Before the Coffin, Nothing New Under the Sun, Toothaches

    1. Much of life is lived in a box. Those who live outside of the box only moved to a different box. Then we die, and our bodies are put into another box.
    2. Originality is a myth.
    3. Toothaches. There is nothing in that which says, "Good time tonight."

    July 08, 2009

    Tim Leary's TV, Rock Life, Mowing Down the Lawn

    1. "Tune in, turn on, drop out..."
      Timothy Leary, trying to explain why he tossed his TV out the window while still plugged in.
    2. The music group Reunion sang, "Life is a rock." Paul Simon sang, "I am a rock." Both were rock singers. I see a pattern.
    3. Lawnmowers mow lawns... not much else.

    July 07, 2009

    Ketchup, Limerick Limericks, Replacing the Internet

    1. Sometimes, there really is enough ketchup.
    2. Know any limericks about limericks, or about a man from Limerick?
    3. If the newspapers are being replaced by the internet, what will replace the internet?

    July 06, 2009

    Unrest in the Chicken King, Reruns, The Shining

    1. There was a chicken coup. Bloodless. Just ask the new rooster.
    2. Marathon athletes who turn around, and follow the same path back to the start... rerun?
    3. The sun always shines.

    July 03, 2009

    Patriots, Full of Sh..t, Trajectory

    1. Today is more than a day off to spend as you like. You can spend as you like because of what today represents.
    2. If I eat lots of sheet cake, does this mean I am full of sheet?
    3. Trajectory only implies potential.

    July 02, 2009

    Faith, Hunger, Cataloupe

    1. There are four kinds of people regarding faith: Those who have it and admit it. Those who don't have it and admit it. Those who have it and don't admit it. Those who don't have it and don't admit it.
    2. Hunger shows up 40,700,000 times in Google.
    3. Kiss a cantaloupe today, just so you can say you did.

    July 01, 2009

    Day Noir, Freedom, Shaded Sunglasses

    1. Today began like any other day... unassuming, quiet, the sort of day that has the sun rising in the east. And this day started as all days should start... with a cup of coffee.
    2. In America, July 1 gets shorted as we think of July 4, reminding us of what we wish all Mankind could celebrate: Freedom.
    3. Shades and sunglasses are the same thing. Strange, isn't it?

    June 30, 2009

    Tuesdays, Human Birds, Rockhard Softies

    1. When a month ends on a Tuesday, what are we supposed to think?
    2. Human interaction isn't for the birds. They are birds, not human.
    3. I'm a softie. A boulder man I will never be.

    June 29, 2009

    Michael Jackson, Chicken Limerick, Coffee Love

    1. The first week without Michael Jackson... that's no nonsense. RIP. He was a star my entire life.
    2. A chicken there was from Cali
      Found a hen with whom he would dally
      Told her all bout Frisco.
      Wound up in some Crisco,
      and squawked his romantic finale.
    3. Love is more than coffee. It needs sugar and cream too.

    June 26, 2009

    Patrick Henry, Fame, Leapin' Lizards

    1. Gimme Friday, or gimme death... Patrick Henry, if he worked in corporate America (or small town America... or anywhere)
    2. What counts as famous?
    3. Monitor lizards are not a kind of organic screen saver.

    June 25, 2009

    Coffee Drops, Kick in the Head, Tissue Paper

    1. No coffee is good to the last drop. Folgers is misleading us. This implies there is a 'last drop', which would be a tragedy. Keep your cup full, always.
    2. Would you rather a kick in the head or a kick in the behind?
    3. No tissue paper is perfect.


    June 24, 2009

    David Pogue Likes Brockeim's Nonsense

    An exciting adventure is before as David Pogue chose one of my bits of nonsense to include in his new book The World According to Twitter. It comes out August 1, 2009.

    He Twittered his followers, of which I am one, several questions. I answered a few. Among them, he asked about a modern ailment. Which bit? Click here. Follow me on Twitter. http://twitter.com/brockeim



    Product Description
    The Wit and Wisdom of the Twittersphere captured in a hilarious, and occasionally poignant, collection of handpicked tweets-the first-ever book created exclusively using content from Twitter.com! To demonstrate the real-time nature of Twitter during a recent lecture, New York Times "Circuits" columnist David Pogue turned from his PowerPoint presentation to his Twitter page and typed "I need a cure for hiccups....RIGHT NOW! Help?" In less than 15 seconds, feedback poured in: "Have someone slowly & softly count backwards from 10-1 in Russian for you. Works every time!" "Simple. Just hold your breath until Windows 7 is released." So in addition to his daily posts about technology, Pogue began posing questions to his "followers" that ranged from the earnest (What's your greatest regret?) to the curious (What's the best bumper sticker you've seen lately?) to the creative (Make up an ancient Chinese proverb). The responses, edited by Pogue and gathered in this irresistible book, are clever and often laugh-out loud funny. The World According to Twitter is at once a marvelous book and a grand social networking experiment in which tens of thousands of voices have come together to produce a humorous, thought-provoking record of shared human experience.

    About the Author
    David Pogue is the personal-technology columnist for The New York Times. Each week, he contributes a print column, an online column, an online video, and a popular daily blog, “Pogue’s Posts.” He is also an Emmy award–winning tech correspondent for CBS News, and he appears each week on CNBC with his trademark comic tech videos. With more than 3 million books in print, he is one of the world’s bestselling how-to authors. He wrote or co-wrote seven books in the “Dummies” series, and in 1999 he launched his own series of computer books called the Missing Manual series, which now includes more than 100 titles. He has been profiled on “48 Hours” and “60 Minutes.” Pogue’s website is www.davidpogue.com and his Twitter screen name is Pogue. He lives in Connecticut.

    Poets, Painting Inappropriate, Book Hugger

    1. Name a poet whose last name starts with an 'S'.
    2. Is there any place hanging a painting is inappropriate?
    3. Have you hugged a book today?
      http://www.cafepress.com/HugBook

    June 23, 2009

    Prada, Cheerios, Honkies

    1. Prada is not the Russian word for 'parade'.
    2. Cheerios are like little crunchy donuts.
    3. Aussies do not call my car a honky.

    June 22, 2009

    Happy Lemons, Dreaming of Myself, Coffee Wealth

    1. Lemons are some of the happiest fruit on the planet.
    2. In my dreams, I am myself.
    3. He who pours me coffee is not poor. Show me you are rich.

    June 19, 2009

    Bells on my Toes, I Claudius, Slicing and Dicing

    1. If I have bells on my toes, does this mean I have a toe ring?
    2. I am not Claudius.
    3. The pen is mightier than the sword? Try convincing the guy who was just sliced by sharp steel.

    June 18, 2009

    Chickens n' Turkey, Other People's Weddings, Existential Posting

    1. Chickens often... aren't. Which, though, is braver? Chickens or turkeys?
    2. Other people's weddings... there's so much the next paragraph could be about.
    3. We are what we post.

    June 17, 2009

    Purple, Bedlessness, Sighing

    1. Purple is a color from childhood.
    2. Early to bed? Early to rise? I'm not healthy, wealthy, nor wise. All I am is tired and broke. If I were wise, I would have slept in.
    3. There are good sighs and snide sighs.

    Jack Benny and Mel Blanc doing Sy, The Mexican

    June 16, 2009

    Stressing in a Graveyard, Car Reality, Nggng

    1. Stressed? Too many people? No one bothers graveyard residents. Low-stress. Nothing bad can happen by this point.
    2. I am not a car. You aren't either. So why are we driving around?
    3. Nggng sntncs n 140 krktrz tks n mprsv nlj v snds n wrds nvlvng thts&knspts rglr ppl cn gt w/o mn vwlz. Knt pst Wr&Pc bt kn gt pnt crs. Yr trn

    June 15, 2009

    TFM and GAL Syndrome, Internetia Significa, Reading Loaves

    1. TFM - 'Twitter, Facebook, MySpace' contagious disease caught by those with the 'GAL Syndrome' as in 'get a life.' What R U up 2? TFM.
    2. Internetia Significa - The condition of (falsely) believing because I can be googled, I must matter.
    3. Man cannot live on books alone' is not in the Bible. Unless books are bread.

    June 12, 2009

    Tangerine Rhymes, Spillage, Evolution of Obsession

    1. Tangerine rhymes with trampoline. What else?
    2. Many cups are more full than we think. Some are overflowing.
    3. We are the sum of our obsession. Whatever is our great curiosity or conversation topic is what is most important to us. Coffee, anyone?

    June 11, 2009

    King Context, Vacationing in Hell, Chocolate Healer

    1. Context is king.
    2. Trips to Hell are never sold on stand-by.
    3. Chocolate milk can cure a thousand ailments. Perfect mix of sugar and happiness.

    June 10, 2009

    Shacking Up, King James at a Cafe, Kojak

    1. "We're practically married," is a spoken by the hopeful and the disillusioned. Know which one you are if you are living together.
    2. "Filleth my cuppeth," King James at the local cafe, sharing a pot with William Shakespeare.
    3. Kojak's lollipop is the symbol of a brave man.

    June 09, 2009

    Betty Ford Center for Book Addiction, Secretary of Energy Juan Valdez, Warm Mug

    1. Have you been to the Betty Ford Center for Book Addiction? (read my Robert Palmer 'Addicted to Love' parody)
    2. Each morning, with my first double-shot, I hand over controls to the Juan Valdez, my Secretary of Energy.
    3. Many a long week can be cured by a warm mug.

    June 08, 2009

    Hyrogenics, Iggernance, Excommunication Breakdown

    1. Hydrogen is one ingredient away from water. Watch out. Explosive stuff.
    2. It is better to search for the truth that to willingly ignore it.
    3. Excommunication is not miscommunication.

    June 05, 2009

    Marcel Marceau, Bias, Short Stuff

    1. Was Marcel Marceau ever in trouble in school for not talking in class? How about Helen Keller?
    2. Our bias is based in what we trust the most. In bias we trust.
    3. I was born short, but grew out if it.
    http://twitter.com/Brockeim

    June 04, 2009

    Tweet My Nonsense

    Like my nonsense? Share it with the world...

    Send it through Twitter. I'll be mighty obliged.

    Tweet this blog.

    Mug Shots, Cup Half Filled, Prince Caspian

    1. Mug shots... espressos.
    2. Let your mug always be full... half or otherwise. So long as there is coffee in your cup.
    3. Prince Capsaicin is not a book in the Lion, Witch and Wardrobe series by CS Lewis. Not spicy enough. Try Prince Caspian.

    The Chronicles of Narnia Movie Tie-in Box Set Prince Caspian (rack)

    June 03, 2009

    Friday, Casinos, Romance

    1. A Friday is a Friday is a Friday
      and by another name still sounds as sweet.
    2. Casinos and tobacco companies have something in common: the house always wins.
    3. Everything's romantic if you let it be.

    June 02, 2009

    Ramen, Leaking, 007

    1. Ramen. Five of the greatest letters in the world.
    2. Anyone still hungry after eight glasses of water is either a camel or leaking.
    3. 0+0+7/3 = 2.3333333333333333333333333333333

    June 01, 2009

    Monday Coffee, Mug Dynasty, Gravity

    1. Saturday coffee is always better than Monday coffee.
    2. The Mug Dynasty... A family in China long noted for its defiance against the tea culture, wishing, instead, the Orient was all about coffee.
    3. Gravity is overrated, underappreciated.

    May 29, 2009

    Isaac Newton's Sour Stomach, I Know an Old Lady, Troubling Greatness

    1. What goes down must come up... Isaac Newton, after a triple burrito-as-big-as-his-head binge.
    2. The mystery involving fly swallowing among the elderly has yet to be cracked.
    3. Some of life's greatest troubles are that we let them trouble us.

    May 28, 2009

    International Baker's Union, Middle East Welcome Wagon and Tourism Bureau, Friendly Cats

    1. "Let them eat cake," was not a battle cry of the International Baker's Union.
    2. Osama bin Laden is not the director of the Middle East Welcome Wagon and Tourism Bureau (MEWWTB).
    3. The season of spring is like a friendly cat.

    May 27, 2009

    Boxers or Briefs, The Plodding P√Ętissier, Necronymically Speaking

    1. Briefs... the other boxer rebellion.
    2. There's Charlie Trotter, the Galloping Gourmet, but what about the plodding p√Ętissier?
    3. Brockeim is not an necronym. Maybe someday. Not yet.

    May 26, 2009

    No Account, Truncating, Singing from the Heart

    1. Just because I haven't opened an account doesn't mean I'm a no account.
    2. Never truncated,
      always whole.
    3. "I left my heart in San Francisco"
      -words Dr. Barney Clark was glad his doctor, Robert Jarvik, never sang
    I Left My Heart In San Francisco (Album Version)



    Tony Bennett - All-Time Greatest Hits

    May 25, 2009

    Paperclipping, Spock While Drunk, Pleasuring

    1. Paperclips are handy. And that's not just me talking. Ask around.
    2. Long liver and prospect...
      --Why Spock should never drink Everclear.
    3. I'm twice the pleasure, half the trouble.
    To the men and women fighting for us: I salute you with thanks. Keep the enemy at bay.

    May 22, 2009

    Contrarian, Rain Dichotomy, Baseball

    1. Never to the contrary,
      always in sync
      and occasionally... right.
    2. Rain, if it falls hard enough, can knock you down. If it falls even harder, it can lift you back up again.
    3. Will baseball become part of our past, instead of our national pastime?

    May 21, 2009

    Sordid Nature, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, Magnum Opus

    1. Sorted, not mixed, not sordid, not nixed.
    2. So much good can be said about Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.
    3. I am my own magnum opus, but I am not God. His magnum opus is that He needs no magnum opus to be.

    May 20, 2009

    Needy World, Blue Films, Breakfast of Champions

    1. What the world needs now...
      is more Brockeim.
      -get the song you are thinking of: What The World Needs Now Is Love (2002 Digital Remaster)
    2. Go Blue! is not a suggestion for which sort of movie that should be seen. Unless, of course, it is a highlight film for University Michigan's football team.
    3. Coffee. It's what's for breakfast.


    Classic Masters by Jackie Deshannon

    May 19, 2009

    Middle-Wing Extremist, Pulling Out, Reader Quiz

    1. No one is more middler,
      than the center of my center,
      the fairest of the middlin'.
    2. Resend. Rescind. Sound the same. Not the same. Feeling smarter now?
    3. To all self-proclaimed readers: name five poets active before 1800.

    May 18, 2009

    Frank Sinatra, Spontaneous Combustion, Fresno Love

    1. The best is yet to come... something both theologians and Frank Sinatra would agree on. Now, Frank knows if he was right.
    2. I often have half a mind to do something spontaneous. Then, my better half suggests otherwise.
    3. Does anyone ever sing songs praising Fresno, California? LA, San Francisco, and even San Jose got a song. Why not Fresno? Or Sacramento?

    May 15, 2009

    Lampshade Action, Astronauts in Bikinis, Unhappy Violins

    1. What else can a lampshade do?
    2. The moon has sunny days. Still, an astronaut should remain fully clothed. Not yet bikini weather up there.
    3. "Is that a violin in that violin case, or are you just unhappy to see me?"
      -something overheard in a mob restaurant

    May 14, 2009

    Hip Turnips, Lying Hobby, Lazy Hope

    1. Chillin' does not rhyme with turnip. Never will. That's OK.
    2. Pretending objectivity is a hobby of some, and a lie to all.
    3. Do lazy people hope? I hope so.

    May 13, 2009

    Barack Obama, Mid-afterlife Crisis, Skinny Cows

    1. Barack Obama is not often called 'resident of the United States.' His actual title begins with p upfront.
    2. PamTee (fellow reviewer) said, "In the afterlife, the last will be first, and the first last."
      Lucky me. In this current life, I'm last and first. One-stop shopping... The trouble is, this just lands me in the middle of it all.
    3. Thinning out the herd isn't about cattle running laps.

    May 12, 2009

    Broadcomming, Pasturize, Orificially Speaking

    1. Broadcom sounds like Brockeim, but isn't.
    2. To pasturize... taking cows from the barn to the field.
    3. Orifice... despite sounding like 'office' and the need to sometimes do some paperwork while there, it is not the same thing.

    May 11, 2009

    Stuck on Myself, Cloudy Musical Souls, Illiterate Mindreaders

    1. Too often, we are stuck on how someone said something than what they said. Truth is missed easily through arrogance or sensitivity.
    2. Listening to old music alone in an empty office can cloud the soul.
    3. Just because I can't read your mind doesn't make me illiterate.

    May 08, 2009

    To Be 18, AFL-CIO, Satisfaction (Did You Get Some?)

    1. 18... a complicated number.
    2. Did Texas try to leave the Union? Yes. Texas was pro-management. Something to do with the AFL-CIO. Or was it Houston?
    3. After enjoying a satisfactory lunch at a fine restaurant, there is a response... This alone is reason enough for coffee. Any reason will do.

    May 07, 2009

    Ban Roll-on, Timelessness, Shake What You've Got

    1. Ban Roll-on: Keep the stink?
    2. I am before my time. The trouble is I am still late.
    3. "Shake Before Using" -Message not found on the label of a water bottle.

    May 06, 2009

    Poopy, Union Labeling, Bells (Bells, Bells)

    1. Poopies: Home to free good...
      -why it is important to avoid drinking before making the sign advertising your dog's litter
    2. Union is not pronounced like onion. No, I don't know why not.
    3. What note are those bells in my head playing?

    May 05, 2009

    Middle-wing Extremism, Fatalistic Cubs Fans, Cell Walls

    1. My politics? I'm a middle-wing extremist. I'm smack in the center of truth.
    2. "I don't care if I never get back..." (to the World Series)
      -Lyrics Chicago Cubs fans sing when no one is around.
    3. Cell wall... issues a phone Luddite contends with.

    May 04, 2009

    Icky vs Gross, Mothball Masculinity, May Day

    1. Which is worse? Things which are icky, or things which are gross?
    2. Mothballs. I've seen 'em, and no, I don't think so.
    3. If you are all about May Day, sorry, you are late. Try again in 362 days.

    May 01, 2009

    Bugs Windblocker, Tocking the Sun, Ginsu Words

    1. If enough bugs hit my windshield that I can no longer see out, is it still a windshield? Or, are the bugs shielding the wind?
    2. The sun never went tick-tock, yet time still rolled on.
    3. I tried to mince words, but all I managed was a comma splice.
    Ginsu Knives, Just for Nonsense Readers

    April 30, 2009

    Candied Holidays, Brockeim Brew Crew, Berried Treasure

    1. Why is the worst chocolate served up on the biggest candy holidays... Halloween, Christmas and Easter?
    2. You can drink a brew, or brew a drink. All good, so long as I get some.
    3. Grapes... berries with a future.

    April 29, 2009

    Underdog's Super Energy Pill, Backwards Reading, Angels and Gods

    1. Coffee is like Underdog's Super Energy Pill. The trouble is hiding it inside the secret compartment in my ring.
    2. You think this is nonsense? Try reading these backwards.
    3. How can we believe in angels, but not in a god?

    April 28, 2009

    American Expresso?, Teabagging, Releasing Tension

    1. Coffee is like American Express... I don't leave home without it.
    2. Words du jour, like teabagging, are nonsense now, nonsense tomorrow.
    3. The greatest tension happens just before I give up.

    April 27, 2009

    Shaking My Groove Thang, Onomatopoeiac Happiness,

    1. I tried shaking what I got, but then, I was all shook up. No wonder Elvis left the building.
    2. When sad, trying saying some onomatopoeias. Find ten good ones, and you'll be happy again.
    3. When searching for myself, I wound up looking behind me. I was sure I was following myself, as I'm always getting ahead of myself.

    April 24, 2009

    Message Found Drinking in a Bottle, Bangles, Headaching with Nature

    1. I opened a bottle and found a message. In the bottle was wine. Good wine. Got the message. So I drank it. Message delivered.
    2. Has anyone a practical use for a bangle?
    3. Headaches are never nature's way of saying, "Party time!"

    April 23, 2009

    Questioning Reruns, Politics or Coffee?, Modern Book-Burners

    1. Reruns. That word opens up a world of questions, not all of which are good.
    2. An awful lot of political discussion is just talking... and it isn't getting me more coffee.
    3. Knee-jerks throwing books out with the bathwater, whether the Bible or the Bard, are no better than book burners. The understanding of either book and their related influence cannot be honestly ignored by a true intellectual.

    April 22, 2009

    Tooth Decay Discrimination, Freedom, Getting Nailed or Hammered

    1. Calling it tooth decay is an insult to the bacteria. They have rights too, you know.
    2. I don't need to protest freedom... I need to live freely, which I already do. Live free. Anything less is not living.
    3. If I am a nail, I see every problem as being solved by getting hammered.

    April 21, 2009

    I Mozzarella 4:7, Goaded Goat, Ranking Filed

    1. I "desire the pizza of God
      which passeth all understanding..."
      I Mozzarella 4:7
    2. You can goad a goat... anyone can, but can you bare a bear?
    3. My name was rank, so they filed.

    April 20, 2009

    Tea's Evil Origin, Fatalism, Sugar Me

    1. Tea was not invented by the antiChrist. Still, pour me a cup of coffee.
    2. Realism without hope is fatalism.
    3. Sugar is a necessity. I'm not too proud to like it. Two spoons.

    April 17, 2009

    Want to My Bottom?, Ready Today, Timeless Time

    1. No cup of coffee is bottomless. Don't tease me.
    2. Ready or not, yesterday's gone.
    3. No matter what time it is, so long as there is time, it is no too late.

    April 16, 2009

    Fawning, Ramming, Vote for Brockeim

    1. Fawning is no less (or more) valuable than abusive harassment. A sincere compliment, though, is worth twice a pound of gold.
    2. No one ever said at the Chevy dealership, "Frankly my dear, I don't give a Ram." And, why should they? Dodge manufacturers the Ram, not Chevy (they make the Silverado). As far as giving them away? No way. Not at $20 grand.
    3. I'm hip and urban, it seems. Vote for me.

    April 15, 2009

    A-Holes, Unapologetic Camelizing, Workaday Superheroes

    1. The center of the first letter of the alphabet is not called the A-hole.
    2. Were camels consulted when designating Wednesday as 'Hump Day'? Maybe Barack Obama needs to apologize to them for that.
    3. Coffee is the workaday man's superman.

    April 14, 2009

    Vanilla Spice (Spice, Spice, Baby), Correlating Correlations, Gimme Rhymes or Gimme Death

    1. Vanilla has its place in this world. Some of life's spiciest moment's start there.
    2. A lot more is correlated than we want to admit, and a lot less than where we lay blame.
    3. I cannot imagine a world without rhyming words.

    April 13, 2009

    Twittering Brockeim... Follow Me

    Follow me for sporadic nonsense and anecdotal romance.

    http://twitter.com/Brockeim

    Tomorrow (Better than Today), First Bites, Mission Impossibilities

    1. There's no time like the present? I'm not so sure. Tomorrow is looking very good.
    2. Few things taste as good as the first bite.
    3. When we think of mission impossible concerns, we think of heroes, not philosophers.

    April 10, 2009

    Deference to Good Friday - A No-nonsense Acknowledgment

    In solemn deference to those remembering the crucifixion of Jesus Christ, there is no nonsense today.

    Please accept my apologies, and feel free to scroll through the last two years of what doesn't matter. Look for more nonsense Monday.

    April 09, 2009

    I Cannot Say Good-Bye (ER), Books Unlifted, Taping Infants

    1. Good-byes are hardest when I've never said hello. I went 15 years never watching ER, but, good-bye.
    2. The best books are lifted too rarely.
    3. Today's infants will never say, "I will tape that show."

    April 08, 2009

    Coffee Aphrodisiac, Sunrise Amazement, Nonverb Seasons

    1. Absence might help the heart grow fonder, but a good cup of coffee can bring me into love.
    2. The expected sunrise is never surprising, but still amazing.
    3. Fall and spring can be verbs, but winter, summer and autumn cannot be.

    April 07, 2009

    Spring, Clockward Truth, Zero to Wit

    1. Spring has yet to spring.
    2. Truth sometimes begins with a clock.
    3. A cup of coffee usually helps me go from zero to wit.

    April 06, 2009

    Starting Every Moment, Bump and Nip, Breaking It Down

    1. Coffee. It is the only way to start the morning... the afternoon... the evening, and all the moments in between.
    2. What goes bump in the night? Cats, stoned on catnip.
    3. Everything is delicate. What hasn't broken yet eventually will.

    April 03, 2009

    Wanting, Vanilla Beans, Live Dwellers

    1. What was you wanted? Go get it.
    2. Vanilla beans. Fun to say? Try it three times for three times the fun.
    3. Many lives are spent dwelling. Probably not enough coffee in their diet.

    April 02, 2009

    3-Cup Morning, Slow Feet/Long Roads, Shiny Electorate

    1. It's three-cup morning. Pour me another, and get one for yourself.
    2. The road isn't long. It is feet that are slow.
    3. Shiny things attract. The good news is, the election is over.

    April 01, 2009

    Truth and Untruth, Fagin Economics, Grainy Images

    1. "How am I sure it is not true?" - A question not asked often enough by honest cynics about supposed untruths.
    2. Fagin applied redistribution of wealth. Sometimes you've got to pick a pocket two.
    3. Against the grain? Me?
      What? There's grain?

    March 31, 2009

    Happy World, Divvied Housing, Absence of Thought

    1. The world needs more coffee.
      Happiness will follow.
    2. A house divvied up will not standy.
    3. "There's really nothing to it," the dolt said when explaining his thinking process.

    March 30, 2009

    Oily Bread, Drunken Master, Punked Out Twit

    1. Someday, bread will matter more than oil.
    2. I'm Bib Ing.
      Who are you?
    3. Who are you calling Twitter, punk? I'm on Facebook. Find me. Join me.

    March 27, 2009

    Smartacity, Sandman Best Not Cometh, Complacency

    1. Tenacity is not counting ten of something you have one of. Smartacity assures me of this.
    2. If you throw sand on me, I will not sleep more quickly.
    3. Choices are what we make when we have two or more options. Never choose complacency.

    March 25, 2009

    Mitt Romney, Cool Weather, Stationary E-mail

    1. Mitt Romney, alphabetized... eimmnortty.
    2. Cool weather chills fleas.
    3. Second pages of stationary are not needed in e-mail.

    March 23, 2009

    Mondays, Missing Wind, Ignoring Clouds

    1. Mondays are for other people.
    2. Where doesn't the wind blow?
    3. All days are sunny if you ignore the clouds.

    March 17, 2009

    Turbulence (or just happy?), Overrating Chocolate, Answering Eternally

    1. Turbulence... a fun word to say, but not to live through. Fasten your seatbelt when told to do so.
    2. Chocolate is overrated. I would be glad to take yours off your hands and save you from its inconvenience.
    3. Real answers take a long time. Some take an eternity.

    March 16, 2009

    Justifying Brockeim, Hyperactively Slacking, Sans Sense

    1. There are nights that I want to justify coffee, knowing it is too late to have caffeine. There are mornings, I need coffee to justify me.
    2. I have a Type A mind trapped in a Type B lifestyle.
    3. Lost... more than just a TV show. It is my state of mind on Mondays.

    March 13, 2009

    Wine and Coffee, Chewing, Lying

    1. Wine and coffee do not mix. However, be sure to have one without the other, and have plenty of both on hand when I come to call.
    2. Chew what you can.
    3. Nothing is worth lying about. You might not lose your soul, but your integrity might need some work.

    March 12, 2009

    Presidential Rain, Spring Joy, Platitudinal Truth

    1. Can you believe that it rains no matter who is president?
    2. Spring is here. Reflect this with joy.
    3. Platitudes are sometimes true.

    March 04, 2009

    Going Potty, Pessism, Malted Milk Balls

    1. Going potty in the wilderness... without a pot. Can it be done?
    2. If it is not one thing, it's another. What if it is neither?
    3. Malted milk balls are like cannon balls, only... OK, they aren't really. You can't eat a cannon ball.

    February 27, 2009

    Love, Space Between Rain, Control-Z

    1. Everyone is looking to love, or to be loved. Never pretend otherwise. It is a good thing.
    2. Rain is always falling. Sometimes, we are farther between drops than usual.
    3. Control-Z solves many of life's problems. Control-ALT-Delete covers many others. When it won't do, try, "I'm sorry."

    February 18, 2009

    Relax (Don't Do It), Exist-endlism, Pessimists

    1. Pressing on today's agenda is relaxation. Be sure to nick it off your list.
    2. One thing can be said about any existing thing... one day thing won't exist. It is OK to let go of it.
    3. Pessimism is never an attribute of happy people.

    February 17, 2009

    Short Words, Flowers Apathy, Better than Coffee

    1. Every word has at least one letter.
    2. Flowers do not care if your name is Buffy or Mick.
    3. The next best thing to today's cup of coffee is... tomorrow's cup of coffee.

    February 16, 2009

    Consonantal Sift, Mooning Moons, Help

    1. Imagine a world without vowels. Not pretty, is it? Consonants? No big deal, but vowels? Gotta have 'em.
    2. Can we moon the moon? What about followers of the so-called Reverend Moon? Moonies mooning the moon?
    3. A lot of people are waiting for help, rather than being the help. What are you waiting for?

    February 13, 2009

    Verbing, Taking It to the Limit, Dwell Swell

    1. Everything can be a verb.
    2. Take it to the limit... one more time? What if you never have even approached the limit?
    3. Why dwell? It's hell to dwell. Avoid the swell.